Now, if you're sitting there thinking, "But coffee is the closest thing us mortals have to the nectar of the Gods! I can't believe that someone would willingly abstain from drinking it! I bet she just hasn't given it a chance. That intern is stupid. I bet she's a horrible person." Whoa whoa whoa. I beg to differ: Three years ago, I did give coffee a chance. And it betrayed me.
At the request of my friend, I took two months to devote myself to drinking coffee. I truly wanted to be able to participate in the "iced coffee versus hot coffee" debate, to visit Starbucks and purchase elaborate coffee creations, to be a part of the "coffee crowd". It's just that in the two months I drank coffee, I felt sick all of the time.
See, I'm part of a small amount of people who have what I like to call "sensitive tummies". Well, that sounds a little kidsey....maybe we'll call it what a doctor in Ukraine called it: "a weak soul". (This is literally what he told me when I had to visit the hospital in Ukraine).
So, as a result of my "weak soul", I get sick when I drink coffee, when I drink a Sprite before eating anything, when I take aspirin, or when I eat raw jalapenos. (I blame my mom who can't drink ice water first thing in the morning.) And as the adaptable person I am, I adapted by not doing any of these things. So, unfortunately, coffee's out.
Now, for those of you out there that are shaking your heads, thinking, "What a shame. That poor, stunted girl. What does she drink when she's reading the morning news?" Never fear. I have been drinking a similar hot, soothing, health-beneficial liquid for years: tea.
I love tea. I love black, green, white, and oolong, and I start every morning with a black and green blend that I like to imagine is warding off illness as soon as it hits my throat. I don't mean to say that tea is better than coffee. I won't go there (plus drinking tea can be seen as pompous even without a "better than thou" attitude). It's just the only thing I can drink in the morning, and I just happen to love it.
Even now if given the choice to switch to coffee with no ill effects, I wouldn't do it. But you're welcome to try to convince me otherwise!
Next week: Coffee and Tea, Part deux.
Author: Shannon the Intern