Pancakes Vs. Waffles

7/28/2013

Second up on our fight card this month is a real heavy weight fight. Pancakes vs. Waffles! Now, I feel that I should be honest here and state that I am a full-fledged waffle fan. Pancakes are terrible and a disgrace to breakfast food. So, I guess I should re-title this article to "Why Waffles are Better Than Pancakes" aka "Waffles Forever, Pancakes Never".

Reason #1: Pancake is a Dumb Word

Let's take a look at the names: Waffle. Pancake. Pan-cake. Cake made in a pan. While "waffle" has its noble roots in the 1700s Dutch or possibly German language, "pancake" comes from English (boring) in the 15 century. The word "waffle" comes from the word for honeycomb. Yummy! The word "pancake" means a symbol of flatness. In the 1900s it gained the meaning as a verb "to fall flat". And that it does. That it does, indeed.

Reason #2: Waffles have Flavor Pockets

What happens when you pour syrup or some fruit flavored substance on a flat surface? What about on something that has a raised middle and low sides? I'll tell you what happens: syrup goes everywhere. That's exactly what happens when you anoint a pancake and you'd better hope you don't have them on the same plate as your eggs. Do you want sweet eggs? 'Cause that's how you get sweet eggs. Gross. But you know what would be a great invention? Something that held all that syrupy goodness inside..like pockets. Oh, wait, they have that! They're called sweet, sweet waffles!

Reason #3: Waffles are crispy

The best part of eating waffles is that they are in equal parts crispy and soft which allows for a mixture of textures that is pleasing to the senses. When pancakes get crispy, there is a good chance that they are burnt, and nobody likes a burnt pancake. Therefore, if pancakes can't be crispy, pancakes must be smooshy. This allows for the absorption of syrup, however, the pancake ends up getting lost in soggy, syrupiness (yes, I made it up...what of it?) Just say no to smooshy breakfast foods.

So there you have it. Waffles are better than pancakes. Now, I know that some of you reading this might be on the pancake side of the debate. This is the part where I make a concession to you. Pancakes are prettier in rainbow form. There. I've said it. Anyone who would like to support pancakes over waffles is welcome to comment below. Later, later pancake haters!

Author: Shannon, the intern.

2 Comments

Nathaniel Tower link

7/28/2013 04:38:47 am

This is an interesting discussion of two titans in the breakfast food industry. While I do generally agree that waffles are better than pancakes, I think that there is an inherent flaw in this argument. In point three, you argue waffles are better than pancakes because waffles are crispy. In other words, you are arguing that crispy food is better than non-crispy food. This is obviously not a universal truth, although it's certainly true in some cases (crispy bacon is better than non-crispy bacon, for example). However, you would not be able to say that a cracker is better than a hamburger because a cracker is crispy.

The bigger failure of this discussion is the lack of inclusion of the much superior flour-based breakfast food, French toast.

Ralan link

7/28/2013 07:40:41 pm

I like both. At the same time, or not. But a Belgian waffle with two scoops of Ben & Jerry's (Strawberry Chesecake and Fudge Brownie) rules!